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Wookiee Hut Cuisine presents: Good For You Steak & Salad & Mushroom Wine Sauce by SuSu, MaceVindaloo
"No!" the two men shrieked, not unlike terrified schoolgirls. "No! No! No! We are NOT old! And we're not going to change!" Wedge sighed. He was trying to explain to his two top pilots that they needed to take better care of themselves. As they aged, they were taking longer to heal from mishaps and accidents both on and off the job. Even plunges using Bror Jace's super-concentrated bacta were taking longer to help them. Wedge was also trying to let them know that they had to act in a more managerial and responsible role, and would be assigned to train new pilots instead of flying with Wedge. In short, Rogue Squadron was being disbanded and the two miscreants were expected to take on leadership roles in other squadrons. "You can't send us away," howled Hobbie Klivian, "we haven't learned enough! We're too immature to lead others!" "Yeah, and we can't make decisions for ourselves, you know that," chimed in Wes Janson, "You've said so yourself more times than I can count, we're complete doofuses!" "Oh ... oh, you don't love us anymore, is that it?" Hobbie affected a squeaky voice and his lower lip trembled as he preetended to weep. "You're SPURNING us!" Wes wailed this loudly and those who didn't know the man would have thought Wedge had actually wounded the man. "It's not fair!" Wedge had seen this behavior before, and thus was prepared. "If I buy you a steak dinner a HEALTHY steak dinner, complete with salad will you stop behaving like stupid children and accept your commissions?" "Steak? You're trying to buy us with steak?" Wes looked aghast. "Wait ... you said 'steak' and 'healthy' in the same sentence? Does this steak actually taste good?" Hobbie, always more curious than Wes, couldn't help but wonder about the steak, and his interest was piqued. "I'm not behaving like a normal human being for a bad steak!" Grateful that Wedge had found a way to get through Wes and Hobbie's resistance, he pushed his advantage. "It's part of you taking care of yourselves ... you're not invicible boys anymore. It's not like you can't have red meat and butter and all that stuff you love, just to be sensible about it. But the galaxy needs you; I need you! Please do this so I can count on you for many more years longer!" "Wow," said Hobbie to Wes, "is Wedge begging?" Wes looked incredulous, "I think we should check out the steak. But I want to see it made, to make sure he's not drugging us or anything." "Wedge wouldn't drug us, would he? I thought he was one of the nice ones! Do you think they'd be good drugs?" Hobbie said this bit sotto voce, in a loud whisper. Wes shrugged, "For all we know, HE'S the one who's drugged! I mean, he's saying this salad supposedly tastes good and everyone knows salad is boring!" Wedge rubbed his temples. "You knuckleheads are going to be the death of me. But I guarantee this steak or salad won't kill anyone so if you know what's good for you, you'll eat the steak and the accompanying veggies AND take this commission!" Both Hobbie and Wes snorted at their commanding officer. "If the steak is as good as you say, we'll THINK about it." Wedge decided to stop talking and dragged the miscreants by their ears to get some steak. Sure, they howled and whine and behaved badly. "Wedge, you're treating us like CHILDREN! Wedge, we're immature children, see?? Ow! You're making owies on us!" But again, Wedge had expected this, so wasn't too humiliated by it. And he knew this steak really was worth all this angst!
Using a large flat container big enough to hold the meat flat, spread out the herbs on the cutting board a bit larger in area than the steak. Press the steak down onto the herb-garlic pile so that it's well coated, and place herbs-side-down in the container. Press the remaining herb mixture on top of the steak. Cover tightly and leave at room temperature for an hour. If you plan to leave it for longer, place in the refrigerator. Remove from the refrigerator about an hour before you plan to cook it, so that it gets a chance to warm up to room temperature. Heat a skillet or griddle large enough to cook the whole steak (you can use a contact sandwich-style grill for this, too). Sprinkle coarse salt onto the surface of the griddle. When it's very hot, carefully place th esteak down onto the hot surface and do not touch it! Cook about 5 minutes on the first side, then use a heavy spatula and/or tongs to flip the meat over. Cook on the second side from 3 to 7 minutes, depending on how well you like you steak. Remove the steak to a platter and cover loosely with foil and let it rest at least 5 minutes before carving.
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